We are in the last couple of weeks of summer vacation, and I keep reflecting on the past few weeks and the previous 12 months. I was counting down the days just a few weeks before summer vacation began. It was almost like a ritual. I was so excited to have the summer off and get some much-needed rest and relaxation while also wanting to do so much.
Now I'm here wondering if we did enough this summer. This was a big year for all of us, and ultimately, we decided not to go out of town this summer. Honestly, I just didn't have the patience to plan an out-of-town vacation. Instead, we decided to do different activities, visit some of our favorite spots, and see new-to-us places throughout the summer. But for some reason, it didn't seem enough was done.
Right now, I'm currently struggling with the word enough. I am wondering if I did enough this summer. I'm wondering if I'm doing enough at all. As a mother and wife, I'm constantly busy. There's always an errand, a chore, an event...there's always something to do. There's rarely enough time.
I've started to put myself first, which sounds incredibly selfish despite everyone telling me it's not. The other day, my husband, John, told me, "You've done more than enough." This was after we had a long conversation where I told him about my fear of not doing enough over the years. How strange to be reminded that I have (and still am) raising three sons and taking care of a household. To be told that I always put myself last, that it's ok to put myself first, that I shouldn't feel guilty for doing things I want, and that it's ok to not do it all.
That conversation with John was so needed and really put things into perspective. I was beginning to feel burned out. There were so many milestones over the past twelve months, and I'm so grateful for that, but sometimes I felt overwhelmed. Although the last few weeks of summer vacation helped me a lot and was absolutely a godsend, it wasn't until I had that conversation that I needed to remember that I needed to pace myself.
I can't do it all, but I do more than enough. I just have to remember that.
This post is part of a blog hop with Exhale - an online community of women pursuing creativity alongside motherhood, led by the writing team behind Coffee + Crumbs. Click here to view the next post in the series "Enough."
Photo by Andrey Haimin on Unsplash
